


Finding Their Own Way

by KaylaAnne2



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Caring Dean, Destiel - Freeform, Fallen Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Hurt/Comfort, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, dean is an amazing brother, hurt!Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:21:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22177714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaylaAnne2/pseuds/KaylaAnne2
Summary: Dean and Sam escape John's abusive fist with the help of Castiel, having to form their own family as healthily as possible.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 94





	Finding Their Own Way

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warnings: Childhood Abuse, Implied Homophobia
> 
> If I missed any warnings, make sure to let me know, please and thank you. Otherwise, enjoy the fic!

“Dean?” little Sammy asks while Dean is cooking up a serving of his famous mac attack that has a secret ingredient that Sam enjoys.

“Yeah?” Dean asks to let Sam know that he’s listening.

“Why doesn’t Dad like you spending time with Cas?”

Dean was not expecting that, so he freezes.

Cas was around all the time. Dean had taken to praying and was surprised when an angel had shown up when he started crying over being attracted to Brandon, having gone as far as going back to Brandon’s place where they kissed and fucked and Dean  _ liked  _ it. And Dad had found out. Dad had walked in because he had tracked Dean’s phone and Brandon...well, Dean had never been so embarrassed. Nor had he been more black and blue than he is now.

But Sam can’t see that because Dad was careful. Dad is always careful. And it hurts to move, but Dean doesn’t care. Anyways, Dean was crying and a boy around his age appeared and held him and claimed to be an angel of the lord and Dean believed him. Dean had let himself be held and it felt so nice that he felt worse for thinking about how his life could have been because it’s apparently okay to be held, to cry, to be weak and vulnerable. But Dean was scared to ever do that again around anyone but Cas.

So Cas kept visiting when Dean prayed and Dean soon found out that Cas even watched him while he sleeps because whenever Dean woke up from a nightmare, Cas was right there, holding him tight and stroking his hair and placing little kisses all over and Dean had never felt more loved than in those moments.

Sam never held him like that, Dean was always the one holding Sam. And Dean realized that he liked being held, being taken care of and not having to worry if his actions would leave him bloodied and beaten. To know that even if he screws up, he’s not going to have to feel that pain the next day.

He knows this because he had pushed Cas away one day after Dad had beaten him because he didn’t want Cas to know and he apologized profusely to Cas, reaching out to hold him because he didn’t want another layer of beatings, but Cas surprised Dean by tearing up (Dean didn’t even know that angels could cry) and told Dean that it’s okay. Dean sobbed and held himself in that moment and Cas was still there, telling him it’s okay while Dean apologized on and on until he fell asleep in exhaustion.

That next morning Dean had seen Cas still watching over him with a worried look, seeming tired and Dean was now concerned. Dean opened his arms and asked Cas if he could hug him and Cas collapsed into Dean while still being careful of his wounds. This time Dean held Cas but he liked that as well.

Dean learned that morning that Cas was cut off from heaven for interfering with Dean’s life, for being there for him because he cares for him. Dean held him and promised him a home and knew that he could keep that promise because he was turning eighteen that next week and planned on taking Sammy away with him. He knew he could win the legal because he had pictures of proof of his injuries and Dad can’t tell about the hunts, so he has to make up some excuse other than abuse which Dean knows is impossible to fit the pictures.

He needs the best for Sammy and Dad let him go. Cas came along and on their way out, Dad yelled and hit and Sammy saw. Sammy saw how horrible it was, he saw the worst beating that Dean had ever had and Dad had hit Cas, beat him while Dean was so hurt that he couldn’t move and Cas took it for a while because he didn’t have his usual strength and Sammy was screaming and then it happened, Sammy grabbed a beer bottle and hit Dad over the head, trying to knock him out, but it didn’t work.

But Dad was stunned enough that Dean had enough time to pull Sammy and Cas out of there and drive them to their new apartment and park the car before he passed out. Dean has no idea how Sam managed to fix him (apparently Cas was out cold as well), but when he woke up Sam was right there, dry eyes looking at him sadly.

Sam had only said, “How long?”

Dean just said, “Don’t worry about it Sammy. We’re safe now.”

And Dean just got up despite Sam’s protests and went to Cas, holding his hand until he woke up and winced. But Cas never once complained and that was when Dean realized that he was in love with Cas. Because Cas stood up for Dean and took the beating to save Dean from dying and Cas was strong and he held Dean close and never made Dean feel like shit.

So Dean brought Cas’s hand up to his mouth and gently kissed it, nuzzling the hand afterwards for fear of Cas seeing his love or seeing the tears glistening in his eyes at the relief that it’s all over and that they have Sammy with them. That they’re finally a family that they all deserve.

So when Sam had asked that question Dean didn’t know what to say.

“Dean?” Sam asks again, but with a different tone seeming to borderline on pity. “Was it because he knew that you liked kissing boys?”

“Sam,” Dean pleads and Sam hugs him. For the first time, Sam hugs him. When did his little brother get so smart? See so much? And Dean took the comfort as he shook in the effort of trying to retain his emotions in front of Sammy.

“Dean?” Sam asks again.

“Yeah?” Dean rasps, still holding just as tight as Sammy.

“...I don’t think it’s bad to kiss boys. I...Dean, I kissed Gabriel. It didn’t feel wrong. I think Dad was wrong,” Sam says and Dean couldn’t hold it back anymore, a single tear streaming down his face as he thinks about Sammy having to go through the fear he did.

Dean decides then that he’s not going to let Sammy think he’s wrong, so he pulls back, not caring if Sam sees him vulnerable because Sam needs to know that it’s okay to not fight every day, to sometimes be weak.

“Dad was wrong, Sammy. It’s okay to kiss Gabriel and to love him. It’s okay to like anybody you like, you hear me? Cas and I...we’re not really together, but I did kiss Brandon. Dad saw us and it wasn’t good, but Dad was wrong, okay?” Dean says firmly.

“Okay,” Sammy says, smiling. “Dean?”

“What?”

“You’re not wrong then if I’m not wrong. Okay? And I think you should talk to Cas. He loves you. He wouldn’t keep saving you otherwise.”

“But friendly love and romantic love are two different things, buddy,” Dean tries, not wanting to hope like that.

“I know, but Cas loves you romantically. He said so himself. Well, not in those words, but we talk and he loves you and you love him and I want you to finally be happy,” Sammy says and Dean hopes.

“We’ll see, buddy. We’ll see.”

It turns out that Sammy was right, as evident by their glowing faces in the morning as they walk out of their bedroom together and Dean kisses Cas on the cheek, knowing that everything will be okay someday. Eventually.

For right now, they worked on building their family dynamic and building a life of their own. And when Sam leaves for Stanford, Dean is right with him, working twice as much to provide the best for his baby brother. It helps that Dean’s husband stays through it all, still holding Dean close every night as they find their own way.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading to the end! Please leave a kudos and a comment if you liked it! Otherwise, have a lovely rest of your day <3


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